A guide to wedding roles: Who does what in your wedding party?

Of course, you two, the happy couple, are the most important people in attendance at your wedding. But it wouldn't be the same without all of those that will make it special for you, and if you're in the wedding planning process, this is the time to make some choices. When putting together your wedding party, you've got the chance to include your family and friends in the most special day of your lives. They'll likely be very touched by you including them in your wedding, and hopefully, will want to get stuck in and help you with taking a few tasks off your plate.

All of these wedding roles traditionally come with their own responsibilities, whether that’s picking up your train as you walk down the aisle or welcoming guests into your reception. When choosing your wedding party, you should consider who would be most comfortable with each role, as most wedding roles will include some form of public speaking, or a few moments of focused attention.

Some people feel that the choice of some wedding roles is made for them – such as father or mother of the bride, a best man, and bridesmaids – which can be both a blessing and a curse. But it’s important to remember that every part of your wedding should be decided by you as a couple, and you should surround yourselves with a wedding party that supports and loves you.

It’s important for us to mention that there really isn’t any set way of doing things. Whilst traditionally an older brother may act as a best man, and your father would walk you down the aisle, you can really mix things up and have a ‘best mate’, ‘bridesman’ or ‘groomsmate’ instead, or even get your gran to scatter petals as your bridesmaids walk before you. The choice is yours.

If you do go down the traditional route, though, you’ll likely have some of the roles already sorted, which can be handy. But for those of you out there wondering if your beloved family pet can be a flower girl, or if it’s acceptable for your bridesmaids to give the speech instead of the best man, don’t worry, we’ve got you covered with our comprehensive wedding roles checklist.

Wedding roles breakdown: Who does what?

Whether you're planning your wedding party or have found out you've been given a role, we've explained the responsibilities of all wedding party members, from traditional roles to more modern adaptations.

Maid of honour

The maid of honour is very similar in its role to a best man – accompanying the bride or groom as they get ready, walk down the aisle, and sometimes giving a speech. On the day, a maid of honour (or a ‘mate of honour’ if you’ve enlisted a non-binary friend or family member, or indeed a male bestie) is typically charged with looking out for any makeup or outfit malfunctions on the big day itself. The most important part of the role, however, is to support and encourage, should any insecurities, nerves, or wobbles crop up.

They also tend to be involved in planning the hen party, sometimes with the help of the other bridesmaids. But like all roles, you might choose not to have one at all. Some people prefer to go without a singular maid of honour, as they can’t choose between their bridesmaids.

During the ceremony, the maid of honour is traditionally the last person to walk down the aisle before the bride and whoever is giving her away – though, like everything, that’s up to you!

Bridesmaids

Brides at Pylewell Park taking photos after getting ready with the bride

The original function of a troupe of bridesmaids was to dress similarly to the bride (literally to steal the spotlight), on the basis that they would serve as decoys, confusing any evil spirits. Now, things have come a long way since Ancient Rome, and actually not too long ago, a bridesmaid or maid of honour would walk behind the bride down the aisle, holding onto her train and ensuring she got to the altar without issue.

The main takeaway, however, is that there are no rules. You might want your bridesmaids to lead up the procession to your ‘I do’, arm in arm with groomsmen, or even with flower girls and page boys.

In the same vein, there’s no reason why you can’t have a team of ‘bridesmates’, or even an ‘I do crew’ if the gendered format isn’t your vibe. The most important thing is having a team that is ready, willing and enthusiastic with their support both before the wedding and on the day itself. This might mean chipping in with planning and logistics (picking up the cake, for instance), organising a brilliant private dining room for your hen party, assisting with any DIY bits, and handing out tissues, blotting paper, or makeup products so you can keep your look spot on.

They’re also your eyes and ears, sometimes tasked with looking out for certain guests, as well as what we in the events business call ‘vibe maintenance’ (AKA a ‘guest wrangler’): dragging everybody onto the dancefloor, ensuring music level is right, and everyone is engaging with the day.

Ring bearer

There's no rule on who to pick as your ring bearer. Groomsmen, bridesmaids, page boys, flower girls, or even your dog – just like this wedding at The Green Cornwall.

The ring bearer is there to present the wedding rings to the happy couple, and is perhaps the most variable role of the whole day. Typically, people will choose a close family member, a little one or one of the page boys to carry the rings, but more and more couples are choosing to have their dogs carry out this all-important task, and we’re big fans. So much so, we’ve even created a guide to the UK’s best pet-friendly wedding venues.

Just be aware, if you are having a furry pal supporting you on the day (even for just a small portion), it’s worth getting a pet attendant or dog chaperone involved. That way, you won’t have to ask any guests to miss out on the festivities, and you can guarantee your pet will be well walked, watered and fed, ready for photos. Some professionals will even groom the dog too, as well as sorting out logistics and timings, so your pet isn't waiting around while you get ready, or hanging about late into the evening when everyone's had a few drinks.

Ushers

Ushers can be a select few friends or family members that you trust to seat everyone efficiently, like this ceremony at Prior Park Bath

No, we’re not talking about the singer-songwriter, Usher; we’re talking about a set of trusted individuals who help welcome guests to the ceremony, make sure everyone is in the right spot, and distribute the order of service. They also greet people as they come into the reception, and provide directions and help throughout the day. Ushers are fairly similar in their roles to that of groomsmen, but may have a less formal role, and sometimes will wear their own outfits rather than matching suits.

Readers

While it’s not especially common, many weddings - both secular and religious - choose to invite a friend or family member not in the wedding or bridal party to read a short poem, verse or section of scripture during the ceremony. Sometimes, this role is combined with that of the ushers, expanding it to make everyone feel valued while adding a little extra sentimentality to the ceremony. Typically, there’s only one or two readings, not lasting longer than five minutes – so check in with the couple to match any expectations!

Groomsmen

As we mentioned before, groomsmen are very similar to ushers, despite them being quite different in their traditional form. Groomsmen are those that are closer to the groom, and will stand at the aisle near the best man, help to plan the stag and maybe chime in on the speech. While you can most certainly have separate ushers and groomsmen, you could easily combine these roles and ask your groomsmen to show guests to their seats before coming to stand with you at the altar. Like the other partner's party, the groomsmen (or groomsmaids, groomsmates) usually play a role with vibe maintenance at the reception too, keeping an eye on things on behalf of the groom and encouraging guests to dance, eat cake, and generally engage in the fun elements of the day. They might also lend tissues, hold on to sunglasses, or take on the role of ring bearer, too. 

Officiant

An officiant conducting a wedding ceremony in the lush surrounds at Denbies Wine Estate 

The officiant is somebody who is legally certified to officiate at your wedding ceremony. While historically, this role was once undertaken by a religious leader, many people now opt for non-denominational weddings with an ordained professional officiant, or a friend who has qualified themselves as a celebrant. This is an important role, as the tone and mood of the officiant can largely be responsible for setting the vibe for your ‘I do’. You want to make sure you start your life as a married couple on a jolly note, in a way that reflects your love. For more info, just check out our complete guide on how to get married in the UK.

Best man

This best man is keeping nerves at bay, telling jokes while the groom waits for his bride to walk down the aisle at Stock Farm Wedding and Events Barn

The best man, or best woman, is there to support the bride or groom in the lead-up to the wedding and on the big day. Your best man should be somebody that you can trust, and rely upon to help you with decision making, organising and running errands, along with planning a killer stag and delivering a memorable speech. Many choose a brother or close family member, or a mate who's been there through thick and thin, but the main role is to assist the groom, get him there on time, handle any issues that crop up, and help quell any nerves. 

Bride and groom

A bride and groom having a 'just married' photoshoot in the romantic vineyards at Denbies Wine Estate

It goes without saying that the happy couple are pretty important. Traditionally, a groom will be waiting at the end of the aisle for the bride to appear, but these days, couples often walk down the aisle together, or one at a time. This is particularly relevant for same sex couples who might prefer to be referred to as ‘nearlyweds’ rather than ‘bride and bride’ or ‘groom and groom’ - the same goes for couples who prefer a less gendered approach. What's more, while the groom is typically the only one of the two to give a speech, it's almost more common now for both to say a few words and thank their guests. Whatever your wedding looks like is all up to you, and the same goes for your roles on the day! 

Father of the bride

A father walking his daughter down the aisle during her wedding at Downham Hall

The father of the bride role is another of the most traditional, and has one of the most set in stone duties that everybody always remembers – walking the bride down the aisle. But this role doesn't have to be undertaken by a father. It could be your mum, a grandparent, step-parent, a friend, sibling, child, or literally anybody you choose.

Traditionally, the bride will do a first look photography shoot with the person giving her away, in what is usually a very emotional moment, but also not essential. Fathers of the bride may also do a father-daughter dance at the evening party, and the father of the bride also tends to deliver a speech, but again, we see more and more mothers of the bride taking over this role, alongside friends, trusted relatives, and more.

Flower girl

A small wedding role, but one that makes everybody smile, is that of the flower girl. While most people associate a flower girl with being a role that is given to one or more young girls in your close circle, this role can be carried out by anyone. In fact, alongside young flower boys and girls, in a fairly new but reliably hilarious trend, we’re seeing an uptick in grown-up ‘flower boys’ and ‘flower men’ often taking a sillier approach with the petal slinging, wearing sunglasses, dancing, or sporting snazzy bum bags. Keen to explore wedding trends? Just take a peek at our guide to the hottest themes and ideas set to define the year.

Plus, rather than dropping petals for the bride to walk upon, flower girls, or boys, sometimes now hand out beverages or throw out sweets – best to check with your ceremony venue beforehand, though.

Junior bridesmaids

Junior bridesmaids do exactly what bridesmaids do – walk down the aisle with the wedding party, pose for photos, and get ready with the bride – but they may miss out on pre-wedding events like the hen do and take a more relaxed approach with their duties, as they’re typically younger members of your close circle (usually between 9 and 15 years old). It’s worth noting that junior bridesmaids aren’t a common feature of UK weddings.

Page

Organising outdoor games is a great way to occupy your page boys after they've completed their duties - like this giant Jenga at Ingleside House

Page boys were traditionally the male equivalent of a flower girl, and were roles carried out by younger members of your family or friends. Some couples will ask the page boys and flower girls to walk down the aisle together, each tossing out petals for confetti, or give the page the role of ring bearer so that they have a more personalised role.

Guest book attendants

The role of a guest book attendant cannot be underestimated. How many weddings have you been to where the newlyweds are left with a guestbook that is totally unsigned, or has just a few pages with scribbles on? The guest book attendants will ask your guests to sign your guest book or leave a special message for you on a photo booth picture. They can also be asked to assist you on the day with providing instructions and ensuring that the wedding party has everything that they need.

However, it is still true that many couples choose against a traditional bound paper book, instead opting for an audio guestbook edited into shape after the day, or implementing a photobook element with guests taking each other's polaroid pictures to sign and stick in an album.

Father of the groom

The father of the groom celebrating his newly married son at Bowerchalke Barn

In some ceremonies, the father or mother of the groom will walk him down the aisle, entering the full room of guests before the bridal party begin their entrances. Others choose to welcome wedding guests together as they enter, ensuring everything runs smoothly with the help of ushers and groomsmen.

As for the reception, fathers of the groom are charged with doing plenty of socialising, chatting and mingling. In some cases, they’re also asked to give a speech - though traditionally that’s the role of the father of the bride.

Toastmaster

Also known as a master of ceremonies (or an ‘MC’), the toastmaster has the very important role of quietening down the room to make key announcements: e.g. cake cutting, introducing speeches and speakers, and clearing the crowd for the first dance. Their task is to act as a host on the day, speaking directly to guests and running the experience. It’s not strictly essential, but smaller, more casual weddings might enlist a loud, charismatic friend to lend a hand just in case, but it’s not unusual for mid-sized and large weddings to employ a professional when the aim is a more traditional or formal feel.

Wedding coordinator

The wedding coordinator is a professional, rather than part of the wedding party, but it's still important to understand their contribution on the day so you can assign any other responsibilities to members of your wedding party. Most (but not all) venues will offer a dedicated event planner or coordinator to ensure the logistics, suppliers, and timeline are all set to go before the event. They’re also usually around in the background on the day, ensuring any problems are quickly resolved and the day can keep running smoothly. Check in with your venue beforehand to find out how it’ll work in practice, but the key takeaway is that wedding guests, ideally, shouldn’t have to take on these tasks – and neither should the couple!

Wedding roles FAQs

From who pays for the bridesmaids' dresses to who gives the speeches and what you can expect from wedding coordinators, check out the most common wedding roles questions, asked and answered:

Do you actually need a best man or maid of honour?

No, it’s not against the law to get hitched without a best man or maid of honour! They’re traditional roles, mainly for support, organising pre-wedding events, and helping on the day. You can skip them, have multiple, or assign responsibilities to anyone you choose.

Do bridesmaids have to plan and pay for the hen do?

Typically, bridesmaids organise the hen do, but costs are usually shared across attendees. It’s not a strict rule – some brides contribute or fully pay, especially if what they want is expensive. The most important thing is to communicate clearly.

Who pays for bridesmaids’ dresses in the UK?

Usually, it’s the couple who pays for bridesmaids’ dresses in the UK (in the US, bridesmaids typically pay for their own). However, it’s increasingly common to split costs or ask bridesmaids to pay, particularly if they’re not super expensive or are choosing their own outfits. Shoes, hair, and makeup may be covered separately.

What’s the difference between a registrar and a celebrant?

A registrar conducts legally binding civil ceremonies in licensed venues. A celebrant leads personalised ceremonies with more flexibility on location and content, but these are not legally binding, so many couples choose to complete the legal paperwork separately at a registry office beforehand.

Who gives speeches at a UK wedding?

The longstanding convention is for the father of the bride, groom, and best man to give speeches. Fortunately, modern weddings are more flexible – brides, partners, maids of honour, or anyone important to the couple can say a few words. It’s totally up to the couple.

What does a wedding coordinator actually do on the day?

A wedding coordinator manages the logistics: liaising with suppliers, overseeing timings, solving issues, coordinating the ceremony and reception flow, and ensuring the setup on the day matches the original plan. They act as the main point of contact, so the couple and guests aren’t handling problems directly.

Do wedding party members have to help with setup?

Not necessarily! It’s not expected or required. Some couples ask for help with simple tasks like putting invites in envelopes or DIY tasks such as homemade place cards or centrepieces, but venue staff or planners usually set up chairs, tables, cloths and place settings. If help is needed, it should be agreed in advance rather than assumed, especially for formal or large-scale weddings.

Once you've selected your all-important wedding party, it's time to get planning how to entertain your guests! Take a look at our guide to fun and unique ways to entertain your wedding guests for some inspiration. And, if you’ve already nailed down your preferences in that realm, check out our ultimate guide to all the wedding stationery you’ll actually need.