Virginie's review of The Fat Duck

When you enter in a restaurant supposed to be best of uk, if not one of the best in the world you had great expectations that very quickly fad away at the fat duck.
My husband book a long time ago without choosing the date but taking what is available, so we are a bit surprised to be seated just in front of the entrance door and facing a wall, I can not say anything about decor because there is no decor except a big aeration grill that my husband is facing, the ceiling is very low no flower arrangment but a advert for the diverse books of mr Blumenthal, one is even named “ Perfection” that is a bit presomtuous. This is things that you except in an Pizzeria but not in a 3* (did all the one in Paris, some in Italy, Us and Ramsay…)
For the choice of the menu we decide to go for the tasting menu because this is the only one choice we have !!!
The only thing I do hope is to discover it was a joke, we start with the nitro poached lime grove : amusing, then arrive a very nice gaspacho of red cabbage with a mustard ice cream (already had in Robuchon). We wait for too long between each plate and not to forget there are the size of a micro tapas (finally this was a nice thing) We then have to eat a little strip, like the one you let melt in your tongue to have a nice breath but with a horrible taste of oak moss, and an jelly of quail with crayfish cream that I can tell you is not the nicest marriage to make, a truffle toast that will not sastify a barbie doll, followed by a roast fois gras with a combination of a japanese alguae, the only thing I can say is EURK , after all the bla bla story about the mock turtle soup of Alice we had served that is not less than a broth from a magicube, then arrive the music in a shell to emphasise the sound of the sea plate. We are not allow to ask what it is, first eat and then will tell you. It was not appealing at all a raw piece of mackerel, another of hallibut and last one of yellowfine on a bed of anguilla crust and alguae very much ridiculous for the music, and very ————-for the plate, you start to be tired of all this mix of taste but still the salmon in licorice with vanilla mayo, love the licorice, use to eat fish with vanilla because I lived in Tahiti but this was horrible sweet and strange, pigeon is just ok not very queen of the blood pudding, the first dessert is again ok but not at all spectacular, and the not so full english breakfast make me feel that Blumenthal is realling thinking his customer are idiot because when you see that at each table 3 waiters arrive to tell you good mornig sir a egg and bacon just after a little portion of corn flakes in a cup with milk you want to tell them stop the circus, wine gum are not better not worth than haribo sweet for adult, still of this laborious menu the little bag “like a kid in an sweet shop” that remain for now unopen because i had enough of strange mix. The service is mainly french but most of all a bit pretentious like the menu and the plate, its a shame it can not be applicable for the place.
Its very expensive and leave you a feeling that someone played with you. Being in UK from 3 year and using more the michelin guide and the square meal directory than my kitchen I m happy to say that there are very nice food experience in London with an incredible variety : english, gastro pub, indian, japanese, italian …that are much more enjoyable and much cheaper.
One last thing you wonder where is the chef but I can assure you that on this 26 of november he was neither in his kitchen or his restaurant and as soon as we payed no one pay attention and say bye when we left. The positive thing we didnt get sick …