Ping Pong Southbank

Dear Ping Pong,

Sit down for a minute, we need to talk. As I walked from Waterloo station to the South Bank last night I had one of those happy, glowy “I love being a Londoner” moments. Hustle and bustle all around me, Evening Standard under my arm and a sense of purpose in the air. Soft as it sounds I couldn't remember the last time I felt happier with my lot. I even felt momentarily excited about the Olympics. Then I walked into your South Bank branch.

Oh Ping Pong! We were so good together, why did you have to change? Why did you remove all the good things from the menu like the dark coloured prawn and garlic dumplings that actually had some FLAVOUR? I mourn the passing of the wonderful five spice pork crackling which was so amazing and addictive that a friend actually once posted me a portion as a present to my office?! Why has traditional recipe pork and prawn sui mai become the rather drier and crumbly chicken sui mai?
Why have the number of meat-based dim sums diminished exponentially in the last 18 months leaving us with a majority of a) fairly bland prawn, b) fairly bland crab or c) fairly bland prawn and crab?

Why did you employ a supercilious, sarcastic, smarmy excuse for a manager/maitre d' when the old one was so lovely?

When did you start to think that it is acceptable to charge £6.95 for 4 tiny rather dry ribs drizzled with watered down honey liquid? I used to think that every pretty little morsel that I popped into my mouth was a bite of deliciousness but last night found myself thinking “well that was £1.80 per mouthful”, was it worth it? And the answer, dear Ping Pong, was a resounding NO.

Don't misinterpret me, I don't hate you, I'm not cross, I'm just disappointed in you and doesn't that always feel so much worse?

Why do you serve weird baby poo coloured liquid described as “lemon and tamarind dip” with your prawn crackers, the flavour of which more closely ressembles Flash floor cleaner than any known foodstuff?

Why has the kitchen service become so erratic that recently the springy gelatinous dumpling casing has melted into a puddle away from its filling like the aftermath of a hydrogen bomb whilst simultaneously welding itself to the bottom of the bamboo steaming basket making removal of the dim sum in one piece an effort worthy of Krypton Factor status? What did I do to you to deserve such treatment, I just don't understand?

Why did you change the sauce on your satay squid by replacing a glorious, thick, peanutty gloop with thin and runny gunk at the bottom of the plate tasting vaguely of something a peanut once nodded at?

Why have a special section on your order form asking me what time I want to be out of the restaurant only to serve the bulk of my order two minutes before you know that I need to be gone (having been there an hour)? I love the idea of you but I'm just not IN love with you.

Why on my penultimate visit did the people sat next to me who arrived at the same time get 10 dishes within 10 minutes and I was waiting for many of the same dishes for over 30 minutes? You said that you were sorry and that you didn't mean it but it hurt nonetheless.

A lot of my blogging friends told me you were bad for me and that I could do better but I didn't listen, I was taken in by your charms. I used to love you, like REALLY love you. Ok, so you have never been a Yauatcha or a Hakkasan but that has never been your market. You used to offer reasonably priced, tasty dim sum served quickly along with a nice cocktail or two. But no more, your star that shone so brightly for me has ascended and crashed, burnt out. But the important thing is the food used to be reminiscent of proper dim sum albeit of a more fast food quality than the big players. Now it has gradually morphed into just a bastardisation of something vaguely oriental with the addition of Har Gau and Shu Mai to keep it moderately “authentic”. This isn't the sort of dim sum that anyone on the back streets of downtown Kowloon would recognise and it is deluding and defrauding anyone who sees this is a real dim sum experience. I think maybe we should start seeing other people.

When you started out you were a novelty both in terms of dim sum and fast food. At the time London was comparatively bereft of cost effective quick options outside of the MacDonalds/ Starbucks/Pret model and you rode into town like a knight in shining armour. Now, however, there is a wealth of opportunity and choice in your market segment covering all the cuisines of the globe. Traditionally a good business model would advise upping your game as more competition enters the market, not to bury your head in the sand and cower with your tail between your legs. For god's sake man, don't become the Angus Steakhouse of the Oriental food world! Scrape yourself up, give yourself a good talking to, have some pride and give me my good food back!

On the upside your duck spring rolls are still nice but that's about it. Maybe in time we could try being friends but right now I think we need some space.

Farewell to the Ping Pong of old, you will be dearly missed. A bientot; it's not me, it's you.

Yours, with sadness,
S x

Various visits. Last one: March 2012

We went to a few Ping Pong, non of them have good service. this place is disgrace. why do we want to pay to get such awful service when the food is not that particular good??!!! the host of this place should be fired, or maybe the manager, if they don't understand the value of customer, or if they don't want to serve, why are they there? I know some restaurants just happen to have big investment behind, so they afford to have best locations, no matter what they serve, or how bad is the service, people just flood in.. unless you have no place to eat, otherwise, don't bother. go to Ping Pong, just waste your money! go to china town, you can get better dimsum and better service!

Excellent fresh and steaming food. A great selection of different flavoured things to choose from, and the crispy hoi sin duck spring rolls were superb. Plus they sell Tiger Beer, so we were quite happy.
Only complaint is that the waiter could have explained the menu a bit better, but otherwise – very impressed.

We had a terrible experience here last night – service was abysmal, in fact its only the second time ever that I have refused to pay the ‘optional’ service charge.

The food was ok, standards have definitely dropped from previous Ping Pong experiences, and the serving size for the pok choy was almost hilariously meagre (for £4!). We were never asked if we wanted drinks after the first round (we did) and after waiting 1 ½ hours for the final dish we were we told graciously that it would be complimentary, which was lucky as we were getting ready to leave.

If you are after a quick eat in the southbank area there are plenty of other similar options nearby that I would recommend. Sorry Ping Pong – never again.

Something different and for the adventurous, this modern stylish restaurant is located right next to the Festival Hall and while propably not the best place out of the parade, they do very well to look alluring and inspiring. This venue is both smart and elegant looking which compliments the menu and cocktails they have to offer. Outside sitting available but giving the location eating inside might be more comforting.

The food ordering system consist of marking on a tick box format order form but don't let this put you off as it adds to the character and fun of the place. The atmosphere is lively and seems constantly busy making the staff prompt and very attentive looking for where needed. The food and presentation is just as interesting as the menu suggests, arriving in nice woven packages of baskets and leaves which is tasteful. Steamed dumplings a must and the sticky rice being exactly sticky. Cocktails are a treat too, offering a wide and vibrant range of both alcholic and non.

Overall this place is as interesting as impressive and merits more visits to get to full taste of the experience. However, this is by far a great way to try this style of food giving the portions as everything but the cocktails and desserts comes in threes. Spacious restaurant and generally busy so I can imagine they can cope with large parties and the round bench like tables inside would cater for a small gathering of friends.

As a HK Chinese brought up on dim sum I can't say Ping Pong has done a good job of serving steamed items, which are often over-steamed and falling apart. From what I am aware, the chain is not run by Chinese people. Moreover, we don't eat dim sum after 3pm so seeing a restaurant serving it well into the evening is a bit weird.

Ping Pong generally does what it sets out to do: deliver half-decent dumplings to the masses in double-quick time. But although the site at Royal Festival Hall may look inviting and stylish, it's struggling to cope with the crowds (particularly pre-concert) and the service and food quality have taken a nose-dive. On a recent visit we were served nothing but a tiny saucer of crackers for half an hour and then the wrong dish. When we tried to speak to the manager, he barely looked up and waved us nonchalantly off. We certainly got the impression that we were not the first dissatisifed customers to walk out of that door. Feng Sushi next door is a much better bet.