The Ebury

I had wanted to go to The Orange but when I turned up it was so absolutely rammed with wannabe Made in Chelsea types that I beat a hasty, rainy, retreat round the corner to The Ebury through whose enticing windows I could see tables aplenty. My first impression did just that: impressed. The maitre d' lady was charming and sat me at a sofa to wait for my friends whilst I enjoyed a very reasonable Argentinian Malbec, albeit chosen from a wine list with few by-the-glass options. The atmosphere is sophisticated, with the low-slung, well-spaced tables, high ceilings and large windows creating a grandiose airiness. Sadly The Ebury turns out to be a triumph of style over substance. We ordered food from the appetising menu and agreed to the waiter's suggestion of bread to soak up the wine in the meantime. The third time we asked if the bread was actually coming our waiter told us, laughing, that it had been given to another table. When the mains came, incidentally at the same time as some now unnecessary bread, the cooking matched the service. The saddle of lamb was actually cold and rather chewy, with none of the tenderness the lovely pink colour should have heralded. Sides of jersey royals and beans were fine, as were the frites, which were also in fact redundant since my friend had had to change her order from moules frites (off apparently) to gnocchi. I usually forgive service lapses if there's an apology and a smile but our waiter's jokey behaviour throughout the evening was unprofessional and inappropriate. The service shenanigans were topped off when the bill arrived with the bread (which we'd been told would be gratis) figuring twice and the more expensive moules shown. This was amended and the service charge removed altogether, which was the correct response to the general lacksadaisical approach, so it turned out to be £33 a head. I suffered serious indigestion for an hour or 2 afterwards, blame lying with either the food or the disappointment. Now I understand just why The Orange was heaving and The Ebury empty.

It's pretty accomplished to make a dining experience genuinely upsetting, so you have to hand it to The Ebury: this was done with aplomb. A veritable masterclass in passive aggressive service.

We arrived on a Saturday afternoon when the restaurant was largely empty, bar a handful of tables. Conscious we may have missed service, we checked whether lunch was still being served. It was, but the question was met with apparent loathing. We sat for a good 15 minutes waiting for a menu and our hungry, longing glances were completely ignored. (In fairness, our waiter was embroiled in schmoozing locals with toe-curling sincerity). Later, when we chose not to order his recommended side, his eyes rolled skywards in a monumentally belittling gesture.

Sat by the till, we felt uncomfortable as he frequently cursed under his breath. Other tables were brought water as a matter of course; we evidently didn't get an invite to that party.The food was so so, with a lusciously buttery scrambled egg and asparagus starter making way for a disappointingly dry couscous (albeit with moist, crisp-skinned chicken). A rather weird ‘bacon danish’ concoction found its way into the bread basket, but that wasn't nearly as offensive as the service, so we'll let that one go.

The icing on the cake was the incorrect order though. I asked for an espresso martini while pointing to it on the menu, but what appeared was an espresso. No biggie. Not unfairly, I said: “Oh, I'm sorry – it was an espresso martini.” I received a withering look and a curt reply: '"I did say espresso". Humiliatingly and somewhat desperately, I trilled :"But I said espresso martini!" and he didn't even have the courtesy to turn around. By the time he served my angrily shaken cocktail (without a word, let alone an apology), he couldn't even bear to look at us. It put me off my dessert.

The cocktail was lovely, had it not been served with pure malice. I was relieved to find my friends were equally bewildered and borderline horrified by the affair. The poor fella must have been having a seriously bad day, bless his angry little cotton socks. My fellow diners have since described the meal as ‘nothing short of shocking’ and ‘unforgiveable’. One laughed hysterically as he cried “but why was he so MEAN”?!

In short, don't go. Pop to the Pantechnicon nearby instead; you'll get a warmer welcome and a cracking feed.

Took our friends to dinner at The Ebury last Friday and it was a lovely evening overall.

We were met at the door with friendly faces and felt really looked after all evening, starting with some gorgeous cocktails and then 3 of us chose the steak, whilst the 4th chose the stone bass – the steak came with bone marrow and fries – very different but a great idea and we loved it!

You have to try the chocolate mousse with banana and honeycomb dessert… wasn’t too filling and perfectly ended the meal!

Definately recoommend The Ebury to friends, a really comfortable pub/restaurant thats in a beautiful building.

This is one of several visits I’ve made to The Ebury in the last few years, so obviously the place is doing something right. Or is it because there’s one service waiter there whose convinced I’m someone I’m not, going out of his way to make me feel comfortable and special. “Hey, how are you? How’s the filming?” And what am I supposed to say to that? Well, except the obvious, “Yeah, great thanks, real Academy Award material.” A wonderful little deception I now like to play on.

The Ebury is an attractive gastropub with an extensive French influenced menu. I’ve only ever had lunch there before and have always enjoyed the experience. Having dinner was always going to be different. The clientele were different, more romantic couples smooching over candlelight and expensive bottles of plonk. Gone are the lunch dinners, the business meetings and saver-deal lunch enthusiasts. All this at a time when bargain lunch offers scatter across London restaurants, reaching even the golden lines of the Michelin star carriers (two star L’Atelier de Joël Robuchon, and one star, Arbutus offer one of the cheapest Michelin-starred menus in London, with a three-course pre-theatre dinner costing £17.50 and a three-course lunch at £15.50).

The streets outside were quiet, those with early appetites leaving work and heading home to supermarket diners and counting spare change. Everyone else seemed to be streaming their way in and the later it gets, the busier. Folks want to eat out and this is a place always brimming with hungry stomachs and salivating mouths.

The room is heavy in oak, with the floor, tables and staircase beams all polished, varnished and shining lunar. There are high-rise windows that cover one side and look out into the Pimlico street. All walls are painted light and the bar is the centre point, stacked high with wines and spirits. There’s a luxury minimalist style as if you’re on the verge of a Chelsea brassiere (oh, we are!), and the whole scene has a rather cool and snazzy feel to it.

On the next table a couple were on a blind date. I heard the lady say, “I’ve never done this before. Is this your first blind date?” The man sighed and turned his head towards me, knowing that I’d heard her blunt question and that his sigh gave away an answer.

The menu is comfortable, nothing too bold. I’m not sure if this is merely a restaurant playing safe or somewhere which removes the frills from their dishes and opts for a strictly straightforward selection? Warm potato and bacon with poached egg and walnut dressing (£6.50) was over-powered with mustard granules that stole from the taste from other ingredient. Stranger still was that there was no mention of this on the menu and my suspicion is the walnut dressing was replaced with French mustard, and to disastrous effect.

The A La Carte meat selection ranges from calves liver and lamb tangine to bangers & mash. I had the French duck breast with parsnip cake and spring greens (£15.50), which was rather bland and unmemorable.

The girlfriend chose in moderation. By this I mean she made me look greedy in ordering three-courses. Her report on the herb and mushroom risotto (£12.00) was good. “No meat? No fish?” Stodgy for me but she seemed to enjoy it thoroughly.

A Spanish favourite, Rioja Crianza 2005 (£22.50 a bottle), was well priced and rounded off the mains to my thanks. A 750ml bottle of water was priced at £2.95.

Our waiter was pleasant enough, although seemed to bumble from table to table. When asked for a description of the parsnip cake he froze and seemed to play over a description in his head for several minutes before turning to me and explaining in broken English (he, like the signature of this restaurant, was French), “I do not know? A cake shape-snip.” “Oh, I see,” I replied, “One of them.”

The dessert was small and sweet and tasty – sticky toffee pudding with vanilla ice-cream and butterscotch sauce (£5.50).

The food, like the prices, is reasonable. I remember things being more polished here but perhaps I’m being harsh? With the current climate to consider and the words “c**** c****” on everyone’s lips, dining out may not be as lucrative as it once was, and eating here tonight with the girlfriend, I could have done with more for my money. Still, brownie points and that.

Square Meal review of The Ebury: ? Write your review

I have recently moved nearby SW1and was keen to seek out the best local restaurants especially brasserie type places. Upon arrival I found the place to be buzzing with chitter chatter and diners who seemed to be enjoying themselves, so the initial impression was good.
The staff were pleasant. The service was also pretty good, apart from my second glass of wine ordered didn't turn up and it had been left on the bar and was retrieved by a second waiter.
However the ''famed food'' in my opinion was not up to scratch in comparison to many other restaurants we have visited. I was very dissapointed I ordered fish and chips with mushy peas. When it arrived the actual fish was really thin and covered in a tempura type batter which was soft and soggy inside. I removed all the batter and there was not much left of the measly slice of fish, the chips were nothing special and the mushy peas seeemed to be the same as stuff out of a tin. (this was £14.50) Nobody asked me if there was anything wrong with the batter. On the way we passed (nearby) a fish and chip shop where probably a better example would have cost something nearer to a fiver.
Overall a dissapointing visit and we won't be repeating it. (we did not get any discounts and did not ask for any)

I was having lunch on The Ebury when my wife saw a mouse running on the floor. We advised the tall gentlemen (probably an untrained hostess) about it and, amazingly, he just couldn’t care less, went to talk on the phone and acted like nothing has happened. We order the bill and a 12.5% “optional” service was included. We left without even an apology. Nothing. Appalling. Disgraceful. Avoid at any cost.

I write for a food and health blog and discovered The Ebury whilst visiting for a review of their new “Healthy Menu”.

It's really a great idea and I highly commend Head Chef Dominic Goltinger for creating this alternative to the a la carte. Calorie counts sit next to each well described menu item. The best surprise was that portion size did not disappoint as might be the preconception.

If you are on a diet and would like a varied and educative menu to help you stay on track this is a great place to come.

Our favourite dish of the day was Pumpkin curry served with fragrant coconut rice- just 210 kcals and very filling. A starter, main and dessert can be enjoyed for an incredibly guilt-free 400 calories or less.

If you'd like to see what else we ate and the calorie count of our meal you can see my article on foodhealthblog.com