The Phene

Gastropub·
££££
·
Bronze Award
·
London, SW3 5NY ·Website·Call020 7352 9898

SquareMeal Review of The Phene

Bronze Award

“A Mecca for floppy-haired Sloanes in Jack Wills shirts”, this teeming Chelsea hostelry has one huge selling point in the shape of a luxuriant heated garden, which gets packed to the gunnels on warm days and balmy evenings. Inside, the ‘Feeney’ sports a high-ceilinged saloon bar lit by Droog chandeliers, with sentimental artefacts and a library of antique books – a perfect setting for revellers who fancy knocking back a few house Mojitos before hitting Boujis. Otherwise, the conservatory-style dining room is a draw for lunching ladies who feed on plates of jerk chicken and pineapple salad, butternut squash and Gorgonzola ravioli or venison loin with pumpkin, passion fruit and ‘huntsman’ sauce. Pud might herald saffron and orange pannacotta, and there are plenty of organic names on the Euro-accented wine list. Alternatively, a stripped-back ‘deli’ dispenses all-day sharing platters, sandwiches and cheeses.

Good to know

Average Price
££££ - £30 - £49
Cuisines
Gastropub
Ambience
Fun, Lively
Perfect for
Dates, Group dining [8+]
Food Hygiene Rating

The Phene is featured in

Location

9 Phene Street, London, SW3 5NY

020 7352 9898 020 7352 9898

Website

Opening Times

Mon-Sun 10am-11.30pm

Reviews

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6 Reviews 
Food/Drink
Service
Atmosphere
Value

Anon

07 May 2022  
Food & Drink 2.5
Service 0.5
Atmosphere 3.5
Value 0.5
Incompetent. Avoid until they get their act together

Visited 6 May. Had called to book at 8.15 and told we had to be out by 9.45. Fine. Arrived five minutes early. Drinks order 20 minutes later of which only one arrived after 40 minutes when our orders were taken. At 8.25 - a one hour and 10 minute wait I asked to see the manager as given their timings we had to be out after three courses within 20 minutes. Lots of apologising etc; free bottle of wine proffered. As we had just had two delivered to the table this was plain dumb, a standard 'calm the punter' trick. Starter arrived 10 minutes before we were due to leave, mains 25 minutes later. Two party members had to miss puds to catch their trains. Service
peripatetic with the waitress playing the 'memory trick' not writing down orders. Doesn't work or impress. A pad and pencil remain the sensible option. Noticed towards the end of our meal when the restaurant was by now half empty two sets of new arrivals on our right were both unserved save water for 35 minutes. One left in annoyance. Quite clear that the place lacks any cohesive training, planning or organisation. I suggest avoiding until evidence that they can actually take orders and deliver in a reasonable time.
Owned by the City Pub Group which groans with debt and is loss-making, it may be that they have decided to scrimp on staff and training. Hopeless.

Philip S

21 November 2013  
Food & Drink 0.5
Service 0.5
Atmosphere 2
Value 0.5
Awful Food
Imagine an invite to a close friends surprise 50th birthday party, champagne in a flat nearby and a short walk to The Phene for dinner. What could be more fun? Well drinks with canapés was exquisite, the walk lovely and on arrival at The Phene all looked well. Dinner was very limited choice (2 per course) as there were 30 of us in a private room and ordering was quick – the wine flowed…looking good. Starters arrived with undercooked grilled asparagus and an overcooked poached egg on cold plates so by the time everyone was served it was cold. The same applied for the deep fried chees but at least this was not undercooked! The main course was fillet steak (medium rare of well done) or scallops…again steaks arrived medium and on cold plates. The side dish if you can call it that were chips but they were barely cooked and were white, hard and cold. Did I mention the plates again were cold! Scallops looked great but again when served on cold plate were cold by the time we all had our food and not very nice. Sticky toffee pudding or cheese – hard to get wrong but the pudding was served on cold plates yet again… Without warning we were all asked to leave at 11.30 when there was still wine in glasses and almost full bottles on the tables. My recommendation is to AVOID this place if you want a half decent and relaxed meal.

Jeremy P

02 March 2013  
Food & Drink 5
Service 5
Atmosphere 5
Value 5
Great private party
Held a surprise party for my wife's 30th birthday. They were friendly and helpful all thought the booking and the evening itself. The private room was superb, and the evening went without a hitch. I could not fault them and the atmosphere, food and drink was fantastic. I will definitely return for lunch or dinner again. Thank you to the whole team there. Great evening. Very memorable for all the right reasons.

Amy M

03 November 2012  
Food & Drink 3
Service 0.5
Atmosphere 1
Value 3
My husband and I had dinner here last night and had a dreadful experience. Having booked a table and arriving on time, there was no-one in front of house to greet us. We eventually found a member of staff who said she didn't know how table seating worked. Another waiter arrived who said he would get our table ready and to have a drink at the bar – no offer to get these for us, much less comp them. 25 minutes and 3 enquiries later, we eventually were given a table, in the draughty hallway area next to the bar. Smoke from the outside courtyard was constantly blowing in. No round of free drinks offered. Service throughout was shocking. Waitress gave us one menu and then never removed them after we ordered. Drinks took forever. She didn't know how anything was prepared. We had to ask 3 times for cutlery, 4 times (and wait 20 minutes) for more drinks. When we complained we got a very weak apology but no offer to make it up. We were told it was the waitress's second day… The food was fine, House wine dreadful but other wine was ok, pricing fine, but service so abysmally poor makes the whole experience was extremely disappointing.

ta H

09 June 2012  
Food & Drink 4.5
Service 5
Atmosphere 5
Value 4
Had a great time yesterday: food was awesome (much better than my last visit), friendly atmosphere as usual but the thing which stroke me the most was the security personnel. Oh boy, they are doing excellent job as I could see how professionally they were dealing with the situation. Here, I want to mention one particular security guard (with glasses) at the door, who was very polite and understanding. As he tried to explain the customers the reason the security staff is in the garden is to keep the noise level down due to neighbors’ nonstop complaints. I must say he is doing tough job yet very professionally, the guy must have gotten a lot of patience. Lovely place, good food and awesome staff, thumbs up!!! Will go again whenever i am going to visit london I highly recommend everyone going there at least once. great regards from USA !!!

Lily B

12 November 2011  
Food & Drink 4.5
Service 4
Atmosphere 5
Value 4
Amazing place for drinks in a very trendy area… the interior and garden are very cool..spotted a number of well-known faces having been here a couple of times now. Food not bad either – i had a good burger (always judge a place on its burgers!) and my friend had a really nice looking sea bass and edamame dish. Clearly a lot of attention to detail especially in presentation of the food. Nothing bad to report really – it was incredibly busy so perhaps waited 10 mins longer for my food than i would have wanted, but we weren't really that bothered. Probably the best looking pub i've seen in some time. cant really call it a pub. I recommend getting a table in the garden – best atmosphere and really warm heaters so it feels like you are inside. I live right round the corner so the perfect spot for a Chelsea Drink !
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