The number of decent restaurants this close to Aldershot can be counted on the fingers of one foot, so I was quite keen to try this, on a Sunday, with my wife and daughter.

The building outside is aggressively modern and looked rather deserted. On venturing inside, through automatic doors, again it looked deserted until a porter spotted us and showed us to the restaurant, to a friendly greeting from the lady at the desk. To avoid undue repetition, I will say here that all the staff we dealt with were, without exception, friendly, helpful and just nice. The decor is all brown and cream and the tables are reasonably well spaced. They are also a decent size.

The menus and wine list both come on a single sided sheet about A3 size, with the food menu written rather large, in order that the not excessive choice should take up the whole space. The wine list was typed in a more normal font and had a reasonable selection, better than I have seen in many hotel restaurants, with several listed by the glass (in two sizes). I started with a large (250ml) glass of NZ sauvignon blanc at £8.35. A pretty average specimen. I then went on to an Aussie Pinot Noir (£32.96 the bottle), a likewise average specimen.

The menu bore no resemblance to that described in the Square Meal review or, indeed, to that shown on the hotel website. Square Meal describes the cooking as modern European and the website shows a menu touching pretty much all the bases you would expect from this description. The menu we were presented with could have come from any run of the mill hotel. The most obvious choice was steak, fillet, rib eye or sirloin being on offer and featured prominently. There were also 4 so-called “Classic” dishes, of which I recall slow-cooked lamb shoulder (which my wife and daughter had) and chicken curry. There was no discernable theme to the menu, other than a desire, understandable in a hotel, to include something to please everyone. I started with the asparagus, as did my wife, and went on to the sirloin, medium rare, with a side order of beans. My daughter started with a Caesar salad.

My wife had asked for a green salad and a latte, together with a jug of tap water and lots of ice, as soon as she sat down and these were brought quickly.

The starters arrived very quickly. My daughter’s enormous bowl of Caesar salad was too big for her as a starter and she gave some to my wife. By contrast, the half dozen puny stems of asparagus looked positively meagre. My daughter seemed to enjoy the salad. The asparagus would have been a lot better if it had not been fridge cold and surmounted with some unnecessary stuff. There was tasteless chopped egg and some crispy herb – parsley perhaps, but its nature could, in no wise, be determined from its taste, which was singularly lacking.

The slow cooked lamb, which my wife and daughter both had was dominated by Moroccan-style spice. Sadly, the meat could have been anything – there was no taste of lamb. My steak was a generous piece, medium rare as ordered and with a decent flavour. Not the best I have had but very far from the worst and quite enjoyable. The lamb came with couscous, so my wife had ordered sides of dauphinoise potatoes and carrots, both of which were as they should be. My side of beans were OK. The steak came with a generous supply of thin chips, which must have been quite good, since I polished them off all by myself. It also came with some roasted cherry tomatoes, which were very good, and some watercress, which I ignored.

My wife passed on dessert, but my daughter had a raspberry tart, on which I heard no comments, but which soon disappeared. I chose the cheese. There was no choice – three were served. One was a cheddar, one a blue and one a washed rind, possibly Tunworth. They were a surprise – excellent cheeses in excellent condition and truly delicious. These would not have been out of place in a 3 star establishment. They were accompanied by 4 large slices of a fruit and nut bread, far too much for the cheese, which was excellent in itself, but, to my mind, was a bit too fruity to go well with the cheese.

The bill came to £138.75, without service, which was left to the guests discretion and was not entered on the credit card machine. I hope that most guests did leave something, since the service was good.

If the menu is as we saw it, then the restaurant is probably not worth using unless you are staying at the hotel. There were, however, many good things and so I hope that what we had was just a cut down selection for a Sunday. If so, this hotel restaurant would be worth a small detour.

This recently reopened after refurbishment and under the new name “Chapters All Day Dining”. This was, in fact, my third visit, after a dinner and breakfast during the first week, when food prices were reduced and customers were expected to put up with the occasional glitch, which, indeed, happened. I should mention that we are regulars at the parent, Chapter 1, and were regulars at the predecessor of Chapters, and so are fairly well known to the staff, many of whom have a history at one or other of those restaurants.

On this occasion, two of my party, wife and daughter, were on crutches, and the management, knowing this, had kindly reserved us a table close to the door to minimise walking.

For those familiar with the old Chapter 2, the new restaurant is a complete change in very many ways. For a start, the former coffee house has been subsumed into the main restaurant, giving the upstairs a much more open and less cluttered feel. The menu, too, is totally different, much more brasserie than the former modern European. To me, this is good, as it means that Chapter 1 and Chapters now offer a choice of cuisine types, instead of Chapter 2 being, as it was, a somewhat pale imitation of its parent. The décor, black, off-white, glass and brick, is not especially to my taste, but it certainly makes a point. The main criticism I have of the new arrangement is that the prevalence of hard surfaces means that, when full, as it was, the room gets rather uncomfortably noisy. My daughter says that the room now feels comfortable, and I think this is right. The chairs are comfortable for lengthy sitting. In one corner there is a bar with seating. There is also some seating outside, which was well used during our visits.

On our arrival, at about 8.30pm on a Saturday evening, the upstairs was pretty full, as it stayed during the evening, with people arriving well after we did. Although I did not see downstairs, one of the staff told me that it, too, was busy. My son-in-law and I drank a bottle of Saint Clair Sauvignon Blanc and a bottle of Tuatara Pinot Noir, both familiar to me from Chapters 1 & 2 and both as good as always and good value at around £27 per bottle. We also had a bottle of sparkling water, a couple of still and, for my wife, as usual, a jug of tap. My daughter also had a glass (rather large) of apple juice, with which she was well pleased. My wife likes a salad and a café latte to start, and these were brought without asking, remembered from the old days.

My wife had the mushroom risotto, which was correctly al dente and very flavourful; one I may well have next time around. Son-in-law had the ham hock terrine – a very generous lump, which I did not try, but which he reported to be very good, robust and chunky. Daughter had the cod brandade; this turned out to be two small fish cakes tasting mostly of potato – as a non-fish lover, I could quite easily have eaten them. My starter was the honey roast quail. The chef (Trevor Tobin, who was here in its previous incarnation) has, to my mind, a tendency to over-sweeten savoury food, and I was a little apprehensive that he might have done so here. However, the quail, a whole one spatchcocked, was perfectly cooked, very slightly charred on the outside and moist and tasty within (the chef at the Wolseley could learn something from him), served with a salad of odd leaves, apple and hazelnuts coated with a slightly sweet dressing.

Three of us chose the rib eye steak, medium rare, as our mains, whilst my wife selected the crab cakes from the starters and a mixture of sides, which was accepted without a quibble. The rest of us chose, between us, 7 sides, which caused the waitress to return to ask if we wanted to cut them down as there might be too much. We elected not to, and she was right, but only just. The meats are all cooked on a device called a Josper, which was apparently imported at great expense from somewhere. Whatever, they were cooked precisely as requested. Mine and son-in-law’s were fine – my daughter thought hers a little tough. These each came with a choice of sauces (additional ones are available at £1.50 each). I had the blue cheese, which looked anaemic, but tasted very much of blue cheese – great. Son-in-law had the shallot & red wine, which he pronounced very good. The chips were also good – medium sized, crispy outside and creamy within. Excellent onion rings. Incidentally, on my previous visit, I had had the hanger steak, and I thought that was even better than the rib eye, despite being considerably cheaper. The chef says, however, that the hanger steak should not be served well done, as it ends up tough.

I finished with cheese – I asked for no goats and was given a cheddar, a Yarg and Cornish Promise (I had never heard of this before – it’s softish, orange rind and looks a bit like St Paulin, but with a much more pronounced flavour), all well kept and reasonable sized pieces. My daughter had the chocolate brownie and banana sundae without the banana – it looked excellent – a heart attack in a glass. My wife abstained.

Service throughout was friendly and professional without being intrusive. The total, including 12.5% service for the 4 of us came to £201, well worth while for very good food in comfortable surroundings.

The next day, we returned for brunch at about 3.45pm, and the day after that we had breakfast. I will not go into detail, but the food was still good and service at breakfast was fine. The full English breakfast is excellent. At brunch, there were a few service issues, and there are a couple of servers whose command of English is in dire need of improvement. Sadly, this is not uncommon today.

In addition to the menu, there are daily specials, on a blackboard, but also told to you by the waiter. If you used to go to Chapter 2, you will probably not be disappointed, as there are still a few dishes reminiscent of that restaurant. However, the additions greatly broaden the appeal of the restaurant and make it a serious competitor to its big brother.

May 2009

Since I wrote the review above, I have been back many times – it is the closest decent restaurant to my home. Over that period, the quality of the cooking has remained consistently good. The excellent steaks are my usual choice, and I have rarely tasted better. Over that period, however, the standard of service has fluctuated. When I wrote the first review, I gave service a 6. As the staff settled in, that improved and I might, perhaps, have awarded 8, or, at least 7. In recent months, my family all agree with me that service has become far worse. I say this with some reluctance, since the servers are generally friendly and welcoming. They are also inept, slow and forgetful. On a recent visit, having ordered wine the moment I sat down (and then had the waiter return to make sure he had noted my order down correctly), it was nearly half an hour before I actually received it, and then only after asking. In the same visit, half way through the main course, the red ran out and I ordered another bottle. It had not arrived by the time the desserts were served and I cancelled the order.

It was also noticeable that some staff were run off their feet, whilst others, putting it mildly, were not. The quality of the service has, despite the quality of the food, made this something of a last choice restaurant among my family lately. Having said all this, service is not awful, the food is very good and my 95 year old mother (who was present during the visit when the wine went astray) noticed nothing wrong and enjoyed herself. It’s just not as good as it was or as it could be.

My wife and I, with a daughter and her boyfriend, stayed for a night, mainly with a view to trying the restaurant, 1 Michelin star, formerly run by one of our favourite chefs, Andrew Turner, now at Landau, but now the province of Michael Wignall. The hotel has two restaurants, the Latymer, where we ate, and the brasserie, so it is perhaps not too great a surprise that the Latymer, on our arrival at 7.30pm, had only one other table occupied, by a couple. It is, perhaps, more surprising that only two other tables (one 4 and one couple) were occupied throughout our meal. Although this was mid-week, I would not have expected quite such a lack of customers.
All of the tables had been set, all but one with white fabric cloths. Our table, a round one in the middle of the room, had a inlaid wooden top which it would have been a pity to cover. We were seated in comfortable chairs.
Although the website suggests that over 200 wines are available by the glass, this was not obvious from the wine list, which listed a reasonable number, certainly less than a dozen of each colour, but nowhere near 200. Perhaps the website is out of date. The list had a decent selection of bottles and did not seem grossly overpriced.
Service was mostly correct, if a little frosty at times, mainly by a young lady who plainly did not speak English very well. When she had delivered each course, she then told each diner what was on his or her plate, presumably in case we had forgotten. This might have been useful to the many amnesiac diners the restaurant doubtless gets, had she identified the ingredients correctly. However, several times what she said did not precisely match what was on the plate – she got the main ingredient correct, but the others were all over the place.
Sadly, none of us found the food to be as enjoyable as we had expected. Every single dish was, to my mind too fussy, with too many ingredients, too many tastes and not enough of any one to give much more than a mouthful of anything. For example, my lamb main course had two small circles of medium rare meat – OK, that made two mouthfuls. There was also one similarly sized circle of well cooked meat. Then there were lots of little bits of other things. I found it messy and unsatisfying. Had I been the only one, the tenor of this review might well have been different, but all 4 of us felt the same way. Sadly, the same applied to every single course.
We all decided to have a cheese course after dessert, and that was by far the best course of the evening. The cheeses were, without exception, in the peak of condition and were served reasonably generously. There was a good selection, from which we were free to choose what we wanted. For the indecisive among us, the server made a decent selection. My favourite was a truffled Brillat Saverin, which I believe the server identified as a brie, but maybe my hearing is faulty. Whatever you called it, it had just reached that stage of perfection where it is undecided if it should be solid or liquid.
At the end of the day, my bill for the 4 of us, each having 4 courses (the menu is priced for 3 courses, so the cheese was an extra) including 2 bottles of NZ wine (a sauvignon blanc and a pinot noir) came to about £450, which is about par for the course for a top hotel restaurant, but a bit much if everyone left feeling disappointed.
If you like this fussy style of cooking, you will like this restaurant. Certainly, this style is something few of us would attempt at home, and so provides a reason to go out. However, my feeling is that the chef was cooking more with an eye to Michelin inspectors than to the general public. At the end of the meal, my daughter said she would rather go to La Luna in nearby Godalming. The rest of us agreed, as would, I am sure, my bank manager!

My wife & I recently (mid-week, January 2009) spent three nights here. Off season, obviously. Even so, the restaurant managed to attract around 20+ guests each evening, many plainly locals.

Out of season, the menu choices are rather restricted to around 4 in each course. However, the chef has recently introduced a new option – a 5-course tasting menu, which he says will be geared to your preferences. My wife & I decided to have this on each night of our stay, and the chefs managed to come up with 15 different dishes, without too much fish (I’m not too fond) and with no fois gras (my wife doesn't like it). After the first evening, we were asked if there was anything we would particularly like for the third evening and we asked for duck, which was not on the menu – the rest of the dishes were, so far as I could tell, ringing the changes on ingredients that were available for regular menu dishes. The duck came in a savoury sauce, with an almost burnt taste, that went strangely well. Other highlights for me were belly of pork in a black pudding sauce, beef and fried Isle of Wight cheese.

We were here last year and felt that the food then, although quite good, did not show much imagination. That has certainly changed.

Service is from smart mostly young people, who appear to have been well trained. The wine list is surprisingly wide ranging for what is, after all, a seaside hotel. Perhaps it is not so surprising – the restaurant manager used to be the sommelier at Chapter 1 in Kent.

If you plan to stay, I can recommend the rooms in the new block, which are very modern and benefit from free wired broadband (I am not sure they have enough bandwidth since it seems to slow to an unusable crawl on occasion) and an interesting lift. The only disadvantage of these is that you have to walk through the small, unattractive car park to get to the main part of the hotel.

Money where my mouth is – my wife & I have booked to return for another three nights in February.

We arrived about 10 minutes late, having booked for 7.30pm, to a warm welcome from one of the long-serving staff and an unusually empty restaurant. We have been coming here since it first opened and so the staff know what we like to start the meal, with the result that a latte, cranberry juice, tap water and salad appeared for my wife, and I got a bottle of sparkling water, all within minutes of sitting down and without asking. I asked for a glass of Alpha Zeta chardonnay, a pleasant Italian version, at £5.20 a glass. Note that the website shows it at £4.50 a glass which suggests that a little up-dating would not go amiss.

The room is modern, mostly white, with some abstract art on the walls. There is a bar in one corner, at which one can sit before the meal. There is also a partly secluded alcove with a large table seating 8 comfortably and possibly a few more at a squeeze – this has a window into the kitchen, which can be interesting. In summer, the large windows at one end of the room are often opened, effectively bringing the room into the open air. However, on the October Tuesday of our visit, the weather was not conducive to this. Given that my wife recently had a knee operation and my back was playing up, we were both rather happy that the loos are on the same floor, so very disabled friendly. The tables are fairly close, but not unusually so for a London restaurant and certainly not as close as in Racine or the Neal St Restaurant.

The format of the menu has changed slightly, and we were told that they now make slight changes often, even daily, which has not always been the case, in order to accommodate the varying availability of game. On this evening, there were two choices of game, red legged partridge and hare. I love partridge, but rarely see hare on a menu, and so I chose that, as did my wife. Nothing much of the starters appealed, and so my wife, bravely, chose to start with the beef cottage pie from the main courses, while I asked if I could have a small portion of risotto, also from the main courses. However, for both starters and mains there is a decent choice of fish or meat and at least one vegetarian selection.

The style of cooking is Modern European, with possibly more emphasis than usual on fiddly bits, so that there is usually a lot going on on the plate, with doubtless equally a lot to be done in the kitchen. Like it or not, this style of cooking is an excellent argument for eating out, as I can imagine very few of us having the patience and ingredients to do it at home – I certainly would not.

The cottage pie seems to be a fixture on the menu, possibly because it is so spectacular. It comes as a mixture of beef and sundry veg in a cast iron casserole dish about 7-8 inches in diameter, topped with mashed potato. In the middle is a marrow bone, into which is stuck a sprig of herb (rosemary?). Here’s the spectacular bit – after the dish has been brought from the kitchen to the serving station, the waiter sets the herb on fire and then carries the resulting candle through the restaurant. It leaves behind it a smell reminiscent of firework night. It is far too big as a starter and I, not a small eater, have, in the past, found it difficult even as a main course. I tasted a little and it was ok, but nowhere near as meaty as one I had as a starter (real starter size) a few days earlier at Chapter 1.

My risotto was a cut down version of the main course (at a cut down price). A very good mixture of flavours and, most notably, textures. There was, of course, the rice, correctly al dente; then there were mushrooms, smooth and fibrous, chestnuts, solid but yielding, and a scattering of crisp cobnuts and grated parmesan on top. Excellent.

The hare was a lump of loin, wrapped in, I think, fat, balanced on mashed potato and surrounded by a mixture including Brussels sprouts, confit hare leg and bacon. It was very tasty and very filling, to the extent that neither my wife nor I could finish it. The taste of the Brussels was overwhelmed by the rest of the mixture, which, since I like them, seemed a pity. Doubtless the legion of Brussels haters would feel differently.

My wife likes to finish with a fruit salad (not on the menu), and this was waiting for her. I felt like something fruity but not filling and was directed to the poached pear. The salad was a good mixture. The pear, divided into 3 came with a small spoonful of pear sorbet and three small biscuits. Sadly, I did not even manage to finish this, although that is no criticism of it.

The bill, including a bottle of S African Shiraz at £52 (2004 vintage and it struck me as a bit young still), came to £188. However, keep in mind that this included 3 mains and various extras. Normally my bill here is closer to £140-150.

Incidentally, although nearly empty when we arrived, the room gradually filled and was pretty full and buzzing when we left. I guess the credit crunch has yet to hit Clapham.

Before you read this review, you should know that my family and I have been coming here for ages, through at least 4 managers, and are very well known, and so I am the very antithesis of the anonymous reviewer.

The restaurant is located on the A21, near a busy crossroads and on the outskirts of the village of Locksbottom. When we, my wife and I, arrived, on a Monday evening, the car park was pretty full, but the restaurant was only half full – the explanation was a function going on in the private room upstairs. Incidentally, I have used the private room in the past and it’s a good place for a private dinner party of 15-30 people.

Even half full, the room was buzzing and I would guess there were some 40-50 people.

We were quickly shown to our usual table and brought the menus, but no wine list. My wife was then brought her caffe latte and salad ( a standing order in all our regular restaurants) but still no wine list. My guess is that it was some 10-15 minutes before one was brought. I had the impression throughout our meal that there were simply not enough waiting staff, and this was subsequently confirmed by an assistant manager (the manager was off that night) who told us that a couple who were supposed to be on had not turned up.

When I finally managed to order some wine, I started with a glass of chardonnay (I believe it was from the USA, but am not certain – £5.50). I then went on to a NZ Pinot, Alana 2004, well worth it at £43, served in decently large glasses.

Maybe I eat out too much, but when I saw the menu, I was not too sure I fancied anything. The chef here turns out excellent food, but he doesn’t ring the changes all that often, at least with the meat dishes which are pretty much all I eat. However, I settled for jugged hare to start and lamb as the main, with a side of new potatoes (£2.50 – enough for the two of us, except when we are being greedy). My wife also chose the hare and asked if the quail could be served without the accompanying fois gras, of which she is not at all fond. When it turned out that all the quail had been boned and stuffed with the fois gras, she followed me in having the lamb.

The jugged hare, which I have had several times before, comes in a rounded tumbler, with the hare at the bottom, surmounted by some truffled mashed potato. On the side are 3 hare kebabs, small pieces of cooked hare on a stick. Boredom forgotten, I got stuck in – the kebabs were OK, as always, but the actual jugged hare in the tumbler seemed much better than usual – deep, rich and almost juicy. The silky mash with its delicate odour of truffle went very well with it. My wife left a little of hers, simply because it was rather filling. I think that counts as an unqualified success.

I was more ambivalent about the lamb. It was accompanied by a lot of little bits – one clove of garlic, one small, peeled tomato, one piece of Jerusalem artichoke balanced in a small dollop of mashed potato. All a bit fiddly and rather nouvelle cuisine. There were several small pieces of breast of lamb, cooked pink as requested and very good. Also, there was a “cannon” – well cooked lamb rolled up around what I believe were apricots. I like apricots, but not with meat. Also, the roll included a fair bit of rather claggy fat, which led me to dissect the whole thing to get out the bits I judged edible.

For dessert, my wife asked for a fruit salad, not on the menu, but rarely a problem here, whilst I, despite looking longingly at the cheese trolley, for which I felt a little too full, had the lemon tart. The cheese here is always good and there is normally an excellent selection, as there was on this occasion. However, enough of what I didn’t have – what I did have is one of the immovables on the menu. It comes as a small scoop of iced something, (crème fraiche?), some passion fruit cream sandwiched between some nutty wafers and then the star of it all, a smallish square of lemon tart, which is invariably among the best I have had anywhere.

There is little doubt that standards of service here are no longer anywhere near as good as they used to be and I have often thought that the restaurant is understaffed. Equally, however, you will not find this standard of cooking in too many places, even fewer at the prices charged here. For my part, I would be happy to pay a few pounds more to have a couple more staff on duty – if they did that, the occasional unexpected absence of one or two (which will inevitably happen) will not lead to the sort of sloppiness we sometimes experience here. Even at a pound or two more per head, this would still be a bargain.

Three courses for two of us (plus a salad for my wife), a bottle of sparkling water, a bottle of wine and a glass of wine, plus a couple of lattes came to about £135, and cheap at the price. Incidentally, to demonstrate that the chef has not lost his inventiveness, you should attend one of the gourmet evenings, where a no choice menu is accompanied by an appropriate selection of wine. The dishes served then are usually not ones which have been seen on the menu and are usually unqualified successes.

My wife and I used to be regulars at The Square in its former location in St James. However, when it moved, it lost a certain humanity, not to mention gaining a few pounds, and we never felt sufficiently at ease to include it among our regulars. The last time we went was probably a year ago – I only recognised one of the staff and none of them recognised us.

However, when we arrived, precisely on time (it was Sunday and the traffic was light), we were greeted in a friendly manner by the receptionist. This was the friendliest of any that we came into contact with, the rest being correct (mainly) but distant. One table containing two young(ish) casually dressed men attracted much more attentive and friendly service to the extent that I suspect those two men were members of staff.

My wife ordered her usual, which came without any fuss. I had a glass of German riesling (£9) and a bottle of sparkling water. The riesling was pleasant but a somewhat ungenerous glass. I followed that with a bottle of Cornas Reynard 1996 at £95 – pleasant, as it should be.

We were each presented with a wooden block bearing canapés, which were nice enough, but not memorable.

Not being a lover of fish, I had very little choice of starter – one vegetarian option, some fried fois gras or a parfait of fois gras and chicken livers. The vegetarian option looked boring, as it often does, and so, although I am attempting to cut down on fois gras, I had the parfait. This came in three parts: a Kilner jar bearing an inch or so of parfait; a medium size plate bearing a salad; and a couple of slices of toasted Poilane bread. The salad had some Jerusalem artichokes, pickled onions and several sweet dollops, which, once I had established what they were, I left. My wife was afraid the onions would wreck the wine, but they were so lightly pickled and so mild that they did not. The parfait was a sloppy deep beige mixture coated on top with salted peanut crisp, which added a contrast in texture but little else. However, the parfait was superb, almost as good as the similar stuff they serve at Chapter 1.

My wife had the scallops, which were ……….scallops. Nothing more to say.

We chose to share the leg of lamb. We were not asked how we wanted it cooked, and it came medium rare, which suited me well. The entire leg (a rather small one, but plenty for two) was brought to the table and shown to us, whereupon it was taken away and did not reappear for several minutes, when it came served up and plated.. It was accompanied by little pots of potato dauphinoise, which was good but not exceptional. The lamb was delicious.

My wife asked for a fruit salad as dessert, and this presented no problems. I chose a cocoa crème brûlée which was quite pleasant.

All in all, the food was good, as it should be.

The wine service was irritating. The decanter was placed on the far side of the table, out of reach of me or my wife. Several times, my glass was allowed to get empty or nearly so. Once, it was refilled by someone I took to be the restaurant manager in as brusque a fashion as I have ever seen. Once, when I was lifting some food to my mouth a hand appeared a few inches in front of may face as the sommelier poured the wine – he did a similar trick once when I had a glass of water to my lips – that is inexcusable.

The bill, including service at 12.5%, came to £300.66. I am disinclined to return.

We arrived a bit late, climbed the stairs besides a heaving pub and, passing between the ladies and gents loos, arrived in a half empty room devoid of staff.

After politely waiting around for a few minutes, we were just about to go to the table obviously set for us (unless they happened to have another party of 5 to go with the few couples scattered around) when a waiter appeared and brusquely enquired how many we were; not whether we had booked, or our names, or our inside leg measurements, but the one item of information that he could have determined for himself had his maths been up to the task.

He then pointed us to the obvious table and brought menus and a wine list. When it became clear that my wife’s requirements extended beyond the usual still, sparkling or tap, he sensibly got out a notepad and quickly and efficiently dealt with the orders.

Just to keep me going, I had a glass of Albarino (£7), very pleasant, and a generous size glass. Subsequently, I ordered a bottle of Mansion House sauvignon blanc (£27) and Dillons Pinot Noir (£32), both from NZ and both good examples of their type.

I did not follow what everyone else had. However, their consensus was that it was good but not exceptional.

I started with a warm salad of pigeon, pigeon tasty and moist plus a few odd leaves (not too many) and other stuff. I then went on to wild duck, with a side order of chips. The chips were large, but crisp on the outside and fluffy within. Although I prefer my chips more chip-size than quarter potato size, these were good. I did, however, have a problem with the duck. This came as a breast, cooked pink and a confit pie. The breast was cooked as it should be and tasted ducky. It did not, however, taste especially wild. The pie had a thin top and a thick and claggy base. I think the base was somewhat thicker than the filling. After a couple of exceedingly unpleasant mouthfuls, I took off the top, scraped off and ate the meagre filling and left the pastry, which rather destroys the point of the pie, doesn’t it?

I finished with cheese – a good, albeit small, selection.

Although the waiter was assisted a couple of times by others, for most of the time he was the only running waiter, and this showed in the service as the room slowly filled. He also had a strange accent, which my daughters speculated was fake. However, given his occasional problems understanding English, I imagine it was genuine.

All in all, despite some good points, this is not somewhere we are likely to go again.

The total cost at £286 was reasonable for 5 of us, although 2 did not have a starter.

Having originally booked for 4 people, we changed this to 6 a few hours before we were due to arrive. My wife said the telephone staff were fine.

We arrived a few minutes after 8pm on Thursday, to find the receptionist on the phone. My impression was that she was talking to a friend. My daughter said that the receptionist had mentioned the number of covers (35), so it is possible that she was reporting to her boss. Either way, we were kept waiting for several minutes while she finished her leisurely call.

We were then shown to our table.

My wife and I have been coming here infrequently ever since it opened as Belair House some years ago. The basic design concept of minimalist modern white in a fabulous Georgian house has remained the same, although the general standard, and probably expense, of the décor has gradually improved. Originally, as Belair House, it was ridiculously expensive for out of town and fairly average food, with the result that our visits were infrequent. My oldest daughter suggested that the place would benefit from a little dusting on the ledge behind the white banquette she was sitting at. Also, it was strange, on a warm June evening, to find a radiator slightly warm, as though it had only recently been turned off.

While the waitress handed out the menus, I was explaining to my family that the last time we came, and the reason we had not been for a long time, the menu was a weird and unpleasant attempt at a fusion of French and Japanese, but that, based on the Square Meal review, I believed they had given up this abomination. On opening my menu, I found a weird and unexciting attempt at a fusion of French and Japanese! The trouble was that I, and most of the family, found it difficult, on the basis of the menu, to find anything that we particularly wanted to eat. In the end, for the mains, 3 of us, myself included, settled for the least oriental, beef fillet with pepper sauce and dauphinoise potatoes (£5 supplement). Two others had fish and one daughter had the pork.

When we arrived, there was a large party of around 15 plus possibly 3 tables of 2. During the evening, the number of couples never exceeded 4, although a couple of tables were used twice. There seemed to be 4 front of house staff plus the receptionist.

We ordered still, sparkling and tap water and all of these turned up quickly. Shortly after, I ordered a bottle of Spy Valley Sauvignon Blanc (New Zealand), which I remembered fondly from Origin (RIP), although they sold it for some £10 less than the £36 charged here. That, too, came quickly and was as good as, but no better than, I remembered it. Three of us had some and the bottle was placed in a chiller with bottles from 2 other tables, a practice I am never totally at ease with.

Whilst waiting, a nearby table had their starters delivered, and we were astounded at how large they were – I have had smaller mains! Within a reasonable time, our starters also arrived, likewise enormous. I had a salad of duck confit with watermelon and cashews. This arrived, beautifully presented in a banana leaf. There were a few cubes of melon, some cashews and some token greenery, but the bulk was duck flesh (plus a fair bit of soft and fatty skin, which I left). The meat must have represented a significant proportion of a whole duck. This was very well cooked and tasted, as it should, of duck, except for an unfortunate (for me) hint of sweetness. Others also commented that their meals had an unexpected sweetness – perhaps the Oriental influence, but more Chinese than Japanese. I felt that the melon and nuts added nothing to the dish, although in themselves they were fine.

A couple of the others had the goats cheese starter. This was three very substantial chunks, deep fried. All disappeared, although I was told that one of these would have been enough.

Meanwhile, my wine glass had been languishing empty for some time before my wife called a waitress to refill it. The two others who were drinking had not quite finished their glasses and I had the impression that, after the glasses had been replenished, the bottle had not been finished. Subsequently, when my glass again had stayed empty for far longer than was decent, we investigated the chiller and found our bottle not there, leaving a query in my mind whether another table had enjoyed the remnants of our bottle. Of course, I could have been mistaken that there had been some left, but, if I return, I will keep a closer eye on the wine. But why should I have to?

Shortly after ordering the white, I also ordered a red – as it happened, Spy Valley Pinot Noir. So, once we had discovered the absence of white, we called for the red. A waiter then came up and told me he could not find it (note, as I did at the time, that he did not say they were out of it) and asked me to choose an alternative.. Until I told him to come back in a few minutes, he then hung around as though expecting me to know instantly what I wanted, a difficult job, given that the wine list is quite substantial. I felt that the mark ups were a little high, especially for red Burgundy, which did not make the task any easier. However, I eventually chose a red Burgundy and called the waiter back.

Some 20 or so minutes later, a waitress returned , with the wine list, to say that, despite her having searched for 15 minutes, this wine, too, had vanished and to explain that the sommelier had rearranged the wine cellar that day but was not on duty. He had been phoned, but they had been unable to get hold of him. Some 20 or so minutes later, the waiter turned up, bringing, to everyone’s surprise, a bottle. Even more surprising, it was the correct one, a red Sancerre 2004 at £38. Quite honestly, words fail me – were I the owner, one or two jobs would be in severe jeopardy today. We asked for the bottle to remain on the table. The wine was OK.

Shortly thereafter, the mains arrived. Mine was a reasonable sized piece of beef, by no means small, but not too large, accompanied by three substantial blocks of potato masquerading as pommes dauphinoise, plus a little pot of sauce. Son-in-law and I, who both had the meat medium rare, found it rather dry without the sauce, but the daughter who ordered it rare was much more fortunate. The potato had been sliced thinly, formed into blocks and then, I guess, roasted. There was no sign whatsoever of cream or cheese, or, indeed, anything other than potato. As potato, it was decent, with some nice crispy bits, but dauphinoise it most emphatically was not. The sauce, unfortunately necessary to make the meat palatable, was extremely peppery – too much so for my taste, leaving a tingle in the mouth and interfering with my enjoyment of the wine.

My other daughter had pork. This came as small lumps in a large bowl on a plate also bearing mashed potato. She said the mash was the size and shape of a small baguette, perhaps an exaggeration – I thought it more a submarine roll. She also thought it tasted funny, but, having just come out of hospital, her taste is suspect – I tried it and it was fine. However, like the fake dauphinoise, it was a healthy version of the dish, lacking anything except potato. My daughter enjoyed the pork, except it was too sweet.

My wife had ordered a fish. What turned up was pieces of fish and vegetables in a light, Japanese-style batter, all cleverly held within a container fashioned from what appeared to be the skin and bones of a fish. The batter was unexpected and unwanted and my wife left most of the dish.

Finally, my daughter’s boyfriend had, I believe, fish, but he, as is his wont, said nothing. However, he not only finished his main, he also made substantial inroads into my wife’s, so I assume that he was happy.

Several of us ordered a side of fine beans. These were as they should be, but, in contrast to everything else, the portions were distinctly mean.

We were then offered dessert. There were half a dozen to choose from, and none appealed to me or boyfriend. However, the remaining 4 of us managed to order 5 desserts between them. A sticky toffee pudding was, my daughter theorised, bought frozen and then microwaved with such enthusiasm that the sponge had turned partly rubbery, partly crispy, wholly inedible. A Baileys cheesecake (2 ordered, approximately 1 finished) seemed like a vanilla cheesecake on which a little Baileys had been poured. An apple & blackberry crumble seemed to go down well. A pistachio crème brulee was described by son-in-law as having the consistency of an avocado but absolutely no taste. No cheese was offered and, on enquiring, we were told that they no longer serve cheese.

The bill, including wines and 12.5% service, came to £313 for the 6 of us. I believe that the menu was priced for Sunday-Thursday (£20 for 2 courses, £25 for 3, with just the one supplement for the beef), and suspect that the Friday and Saturday prices would be higher. So reasonable food prices, despite the somewhat high wine prices. The two women serving were sweet and helpful, although no-one seemed especially attentive. The two men serving did what was needed, no more.

This could be such a great venue, in a well-heeled area a bit light on really good restaurants, but, despite several make-overs, I still feel it has not quite got it right. A shame.

I arrived a couple of minutes before the booked time, 7pm, to a friendly welcome from the doorman and a confusion of people just inside the door. However, I was soon shown to our table, to find that I was the first to arrive. However, my host and the other guest arrived within a few minutes. I had ordered a bottle of sparkling water on my arrival, and this turned up shortly after the rest had seated and was distributed among us.

The room is enormous, rather grand, and, I believe, has further seating upstairs at one end. We were seated on a small table, just big enough for 3, in close proximity to our neighbours on my left. The room was fairly noisy and very, very crowded. The tables, as is too common in London, were crammed together, to make the most of very expensive floor space.

Throughout the meal, the service was correct and professional, but not friendly. However, it is to his credit that the waiter who took orders, on a couple of occasions, came up to the table primed to do so and, seeing us deep in conversation, silently went away.

Two of us each started with a Kir Royale, and the other had a lager. The Kir Royale was well made without the usual excess of cassis. We then went on to bottle of Haut Medoc, which I believe is the 2003 Château Liversan, on the list at £29.50, and very pleasant. We had at least one further bottle of this.

The menu is enormous, covering a wide range of food types from soup and sandwich to a full scale meal. I started with roast quail and lentils. This seemed to be a whole bird cut into 4 pieces in a sea of lentils. The quail was somewhat lacking in taste, but the broth in which the lentils were swimming made up for it. However, in the end, a rather unsatisfying dish.

My main was the Thursday dish of the day, duck parmentier. This was a small round of shredded duck flesh, very thoroughly cooked, and surmounted by mashed potato – a duck version of shepherd’s pie. There was also a meaty gravy, which was really needed, as the duck and potato were otherwise a little on the dry side. At the suggestion of the waiter, I also ordered some minted peas, a small dish, for which, of course, there was a supplement. On the whole, I enjoyed the duck, and, whilst it seemed a rather mean portion when I looked at it marooned in the middle of the plate, in fact, there was plenty of duck and a sufficiency of potato.

By this time, the wine was finished, and so my companions chose a glass each of a sticky (an Austrian Beerenauslese at £11.75 per glass) to go with their desserts, while I had a glass of calvados (£10) to go with cheese. The cheese consisted of one piece each of Blue Vinny, Lincolnshire Poacher and a goats, Tovey. All were in good condition, and I was pleased to see the Poacher in a restaurant.

We were enjoying the last of our drinks and contemplating another when a short bearded gentleman turned up to announce that we had outstayed our welcome. In fact, he said that we had been allowed the table until 9pm (it was then 9.37pm) and it was now needed; would we like the bill. My host had no memory of being told on booking that there was a 2 hour limit, and I, for one, would not normally book a restaurant with such a policy. Not knowing how the booking was made, I cannot say if the restaurant was at fault, but it made for an unpleasant end to an otherwise pleasant evening.

I understand that my companions enjoyed their food, as did I, although there was nothing outstanding. The wine was decent and not grossly over-priced. Service was professional, but unmemorable. There are many other restaurants where you can get a meal at least as good and not get thrown out at the end (Racine, for one). If you want decent, fast food, fast service, fine. If you want to enjoy a leisurely dinner, then forget it, and that’s just what I will do – forget it.