Dedicated followers of food fashion have turned restaurants into a serious hobby. Does anyone ever dine out to simply enjoy themselves?
Whenever I visit a newly opened restaurant, I invariably see the same faces. There’s the social media star so busy finding the right camera angle for the succession of dishes he orders that he only manages a couple of bites. There’s the blogger dropping names like Eminem drops F-bombs and regaling everyone within earshot with tales of all-expenses-paid press trips. There’s the bearded guy sitting alone, chewing so solemnly you wonder whether it might be his death row meal. There’s the journalist nodding mechanically at someone from the restaurant’s PR team, mentally checking off her list of Important Things To Mention. And then there are all those people tapping away on their mobile phones, only lifting their eyes to request the all-important Wi-Fi password or to tell their date to BACK AWAY from their starter until they’ve finished documenting it on Instagram.
What do all these diners have in common? They’re not having fun. Sure, they might be creating the illusion of fun via filters, hashtags and the spectre of FOMO. They might even believe they are having fun as they network and let the PR pick up the tab. But if they were being honest, they’d admit they’re not there for enjoyment’s sake anymore.
It’s not just industry insiders who are stripping the inherent fun from dining out – it’s an essentially human trait to extract all the pleasure from the things we love. Think of lepidopterists, painstakingly capturing beautiful butterflies and pinning their dead bodies to a display board. Think of music lovers playing the same few bars ad nauseam to get a piece exactly right. Think of wine bores, football bores, politics bores – all people who make the subject that fascinates them such a specialism that absolutely nobody wants to talk to them about it.
It’s the same with food fanatics. Trend-following diners are seeing each opening as little more than another item to cross off their to-do list. Instead of turning up at a hot new restaurant because they’ve heard it’s amazing or the concept excites them, they follow the hype – and the herd – to be first through the doors. An endless queue outside a no-bookings newcomer isn’t the restaurant enthusiast’s cue to choose one of London’s zillion alternatives and save this experience for another time – it’s proof that they’re in the right place. They resign themselves, comforted by the knowledge that a lengthy wait only adds value to the bragging rights.
In our heart of hearts, we all know that dining out should be about pure enjoyment, and that a restaurant’s food, however delicious or avant-garde, cannot get the party started on its own. Believe me, chefs have tried enforced foodie fun: I’ve seen menus attempting jokes (er, ha?), laboured concepts explained by staff as if to pre-school children, and attention-seeking gimmicks (well hello again, liquid nitrogen…) all rolled out in the name of fun. But none of these can bring the good times without help from spot-on service, sexy decor and a killer ambience.
Five FUN FOOD JOINTS
Big Easy
Nobody comes to this long-established American theme restaurant for anything other than a good time: you can’t take things seriously when you’re wearing a bib.
Chiltern Firehouse
This celeb magnet has retained its crown as London’s leading hotspot thanks to a thrilling ambience based around the promise of fun.
The Ivy
An iconic London haven for seen-it-all Londoners who’ve eaten everywhere. Guests know it’s their duty to bring the most fabulous versions of themselves to dinner.
Le Gavroche
The old-school spot-on service and food allows you to get on with having a great time. Plus with no signal, it’s a Twitter-free zone.
Rök
This Shoreditch newbie proves even
high-concept meals can be served in a fun, down-to-earth way.
For a restaurant to nail that elusive je ne sais quoi, it also needs diners to play the game. You wouldn’t turn up to a party and spend all night taking pictures of your beer, would you? No: you’d just enjoy yourself. Why should a meal out be any different?
I know restaurants need bloggers, social media mentions and reviews to build that important word-of-mouth buzz. But most chefs and restaurateurs didn’t create their restaurants with these people in mind – they want ordinary folk to book tables and be blown away, and to continue doing so long after the fickle early adopters move on to the Next Big Opening.
So let’s all try to take dining out a bit less seriously: if Cara Delevingne and Sam Rollinson can prick the pompous bubble of high fashion and get away with it, the least we food lovers can do is lighten up.
This article was first published in the autumn 2015 issue of Square Meal Lifestyle magazine