Bodean's Fulham

Poor service, greasy food and watered down APPLE JUICE masqerading as a “cocktail” (it didn't even contain alcohol!). In all fairness, this was what was offered on the GROUPON deal, so perhaps “normal” customers receive better fare. But that's really no excuse – yet another business that loves the Groupon marketing opportunity, but then can't – or won't – offer these customers what they've been promised. I won't be back.

As someone who has relatives in the South and has stayed there over several long vacations, I struggle to reconcile the food served here with anything recognisable in my experience. The water-logged nachos started the meal on a low point, and pulled pork, one of nature's most sublime, unhealthiest and delicious treats on the planet, was … well let me put it this way. I wouldn't allow the chef responsible to leave the kitchen unescorted if there were any good 'ol boys in the neighbourhood. Hurt would be involved. We sent several dishes back which were too cold or terribly cooked to be fit for consumption by anyone, even under the influence of direct transfusions of Jack Daniels.

After too much fancy food you get a yearning for something basic, something you can grab in your hands and bite down into, something seared, a bit sweet, a bit burned, laced with mustard or ketchup, something that dribbles down your chin when you eat it. When you're in that sort of mood Bodean's is the best place to head for. Bodean's isn't a place you linger or admire although the low lighting, dark wood banquettes and decorative American ephemera are welcoming enough. It's an honest, if slightly gaudy, eatery, great for kids and grabbing a bite before a film, or for diving into as a gang when you've been out all day and are starving. The food is straightforward and the ribs you had last week will be the same as the ribs you have this week – up market fast food with decent meat, cold beer (good US beers on tap, no less) and cheery service. The ribs are, by the way, excellent in an American way, ie slightly sweet, fall off the bone tender. Tuck that bib in and get sucking! Don't be put off by the high price on this review; it's not the sort of joint you sit down for three courses, and given the lavish portion sizes you're more likely to duck in for a main (around £10-12) and a couple of beers, making for a much more mangable spend.